Who To Boo

About a decade ago, Washington Wizards fans were pioneers. Before Boston fans, Detroit fans or any other team's fans booed LeBron James, me and my fellow home team fans at Verizon Center booed LeBron mercilessly every time he touched the ball. Without exception. And what did this get us? A 12-7 regular season home record against LeBron's teams over the last ten years. Yes, I know LeBron didn't play in all those games and the playoff record was just 1-4 over that span but the point is the crowd was into it in a serious way. Wizards fans were worked up into a frenzy for those games and the relentless booing paid off big time.

Now lately I've noticed a disturbing trend. Last year I booed LeBron every time he touched the ball in the one game he participated in at VC but the most of the folks sitting around me remained quiet. What the heck is going on here? Do we care anymore about booing the opponents? The answer there of course is maybe not. John Wall got booed at the free throw line during the Los Angeles Lakers' annual trip to Verizon Center last year and hometown former hero Kevin Durant disparaged Washington's fans for their lack of support for the home team before blowing the Wizards off completely in the offseason.

Well I've had enough and so should every self-respecting Wizards fan (but especially the season ticket holders) out there. We need to show up and we need to be loud. I'm not talking piped-in-crowd-noise-in-Miami-or-Boston-loud. I mean LOUD!!!!! Like DeShawn-Stevenson-Soulja-Boy loud. And when I say show up, I mean SHOW UP. I mean don't blow off Tuesday games against Milwaukee because you've had a tough day at work and don't sell your Warriors tickets because you can make a quick buck. Get your butts in some seats and yell.

So here's my proposal: let's pick one guy on the opposing team for the big games (meaning those that are likely to have "fans" of the other team show up) and boo him every time he touches the ball. All of us. Together. Whether the Wizards are ahead or behind. Pour all your frustrations, love of the Wizards or whatever else you need to into making as much noise as possible when that one player touches the ball for whatever amount of time. Come on, Wizards fans. I know you can do this. After all, by concentrating on one villain, this is the only way we seem to have made a bunch of noise in the past.

Our home opener is one week from tomorrow night. In the interest of getting a coordinated effort going here, below are my proposed booees for the big games this season. We have to start out hot this year and we have to throw all our support behind this team from the home opener. Please. When the guys listed below touch the ball, boo like your lives depend on it. And yes, I thought about listing a target booee for the home opener against the Toronto Raptors but I figured (a) nobody really cares that much about any of the Raps' players to boo heartily (plus the last time we played really important basketball against Toronto it was a playoff sweep) and (b) if our crowd can't make a little noise for the opener, we are in real trouble crowd-wise.

Friday, November 4 / Wednesday March 22: Atlanta Hawks (Home Games 2 & 38)

Who: Dwight Howard

Is there any more fun guy to boo than Dwight Howard? Not for my money, there isn't. Dwight's a guy who behaves in a way to make absolutely nobody like him and seems to get upset any time anyone doesn't love him. He's a complicated guy for sure. And an easy target for some booing. And let's face it, there's nobody else on the Hawks even remotely unlikeable now that playoff Wizard killer Al Horford has bolted Atlanta. We'll get to Horford. Quickly. Let's let Dwight know that we don't like him in Washington. Let's hurt his feelings enough that he going to devolve into a passive player on the offensive end and an even worse free throw shooter than he is usually.

Monday, November 7: Houston Rockets (Home Game 3)

Who: James Harden

There's something really offensive about Harden's game to me. Yes, he can fill it up like almost every game but his absolute refusal to play any sort of defense (and this is not a hyperbole, he literally just refuses to pay any sort of attention) and his incessant flopping drive me absolutely crazy. The fact that Harden actually got somewhat offended by his not winning the 2014-15 NBA MVP award is amazing to me. So of course, I love to boo James Harden because yes, he's good at some parts of the game but he sees that part of his game as his only responsibility to the game and his teammates. There should be some trash talking to go with this one from folks sitting closer to the court than I do. Need to get on Harden for the embarrassment that he is on the defensive end.

Wednesday, November 9 / Tuesday, January 24: Boston Celtics (Home Games 4 &  25)

Who: Al Horford

Why do we dis-like Al Horford, a dude that has been singularly unremarkable from an opponent fan hating perspective his entire career? Well quite simply because he told the world (just like Kevin Durant and don't worry we'll get to Mr. DC very soon) that Wizards fans, the people sitting in the stands at Verizon Center, suck. 

Now if that's not an affront enough to Wizards fans sitting in Verizon Center every game, I don't know what is. This is bulletin board material, folks. The Celtics (yes, Jae Crowder I'm looking at you) think they own the Wizards because they swept us last year. Let's prove that wrong this year, Wizards fans. Yes, I get that the Cs seemingly put as many fans in seats at VC as the Wizards do but come on, we know that's not true. Get upset a bit here folks. Let's make Al Horford feel hated like he never has before. Put two hands tougher and booooooo!!!!!

Friday, November 11 / Monday, February 6: Cleveland Cavaliers (Home Games 5 & 29)

Who: LeBron James

If you are a Wizards fan and don't know why you need to boo LeBron James when he's in Verizon Center, then you are not a Wizards fan. Enough said here. Let's move on.

Monday, November 28: Sacramento Kings (Home Game 10)

DeMarcus Cousins

I know what you are thinking here. Why should I as a Wizards season ticket holder be concerned about booing a team that is continually near the bottom of their conference and is arguably the most dysfunctional team in the entire league? Well quite honestly because we need every win we can get and on a list of guys most likely to get a technical foul, DeMarcus Cousins is about number one on that list. So why not try to goad him into one or two, right? I mean the booing can't hurt, which I think is sort of a point of this entire post.

Now if you really need a legit reason to hate DMC in this game, he got into it in the preseason with Kelly Oubre, Jr. when the two swapped an elbow exchange (not caught on film apparently). Just boo when Cousins touches the ball, would you?

Sunday, December 18: Los Angeles Clippers (Home Game #16)

Who: Blake Griffin

If Dwight Howard is the most fun guy to boo in the NBA, Blake Griffin might be the second. Both have a complex of sorts but whereas Dwight can't stand being not liked, Blake seems to object to everyone thinking he's a flopper and a crybaby. And let's make no mistake about it: he is for sure. He's whiny and petty and insistent on casting himself as a victim. And if you needed any other reason, let's not forget the 2011 Slam Dunk Contest. It's rare that I ever claim JaVale McGee is in the right but there's no way Blake beat Big Daddy Wookie in that dunk contest. Do this one for JaVale if you need that motivation.

Tuesday, January 10 / Friday, March 17: Chicago Bulls (Home Games 21 & 37)

Jimmy Butler

If there's a guy on this list that's about as uncontroversial as it gets, it's Al Horford. After that comes Jimmy Butler. I mean what's not to like about this guy's story? The absolute last first round pick in his draft class, a guy who made his reputation in the NBA on hawking defense who's now blossomed through hard work and dedication to be the two-way star on one of the most popular teams in the NBA? Well, because of the 2014 playoffs, I don't like Jimmy Butler. 

Yes, there may be other villains on the Bulls' roster worth jeering like Dwayne Wade (remember the Heat sweep of the Wizards in the second round in 2004?) and Rajon Rondo (the James Harden of assists), Jimmy Butler's my guy for this post. And if you don't remember, it was Butler who got off scott free while Nenê drew a one game suspension in the '14 playoffs. Didn't matter. We won that game anyway while Ted Leonsis led the chant of "Free Nenê!" in his number 42 jersey from the owners' seats. It's time to boo Butler on January 10 and March 17 (when I am sure Chicago will be sporting those obnoxious St. Patrick's Day unis).

Monday, February 13: Oklahoma City Thunder (Home Game 31)

Russell Westbrook

So I realize the last five or so years against the Thunder have been pretty good at Verizon Center. I mean who can forget Bradley Beal sinking that last second or so bucket against Oklahoma City in his rookie year? But the last couple of years? We've lost to the Thunder in Washington, including last year in embarrassing fashion. I mean we really stood no chance last year because Russell Westbrook bullied his way into a victory via 22 points (and a +23 overall) in just 27 minutes. Let's stop this nonsense this year and boo Westbrook into submission, please.

Tuesday, February 28: Golden State Warriors (Home Game 33)

Kevin Durant

First of all, let go of the image above. Like forever. It's photoshopped after all anyway.

This whole fan support controversy, if you can call it that, might have started with Kevin Durant. That's right. Tired of getting cheered in his hometown (God forbid), KD took a swing at the Verizon Center faithful before his trip here last season, calling us fans "disrespectful" for cheering him and saying "I wouldn't like it if I was on that team." Notwithstanding the fact that I and a whole bunch of other Wizards fans have NEVER rooted for an opponent in Verizon Center (the polite applause for former Wizards doesn't count), we did KD proud when he visited Washington last November and booed him off the court.

Now we have to do the same when he comes here with his new super team the Golden State Warriors. And I mean like really loud, guys. I thought Verizon Center made a good amount of noise when both eh Thunder and the Dubs came to town last year in support of the Wizards. Let's make our voices really heard this year by booing Kevin Durant mercilessly whenever he touches the ball. Let's make him feel respected as an opponent. And look, for those of you who plan on showing up to that game and rooting for the Warriors because somehow you've always been a Golden State fan or you "went to school with Steph" (I'm talking to the two dudes in front of us last year who happened to matriculate at Davidson while Curry was in school there) you didn't care about that team before a couple of years ago. So drop it. 

There are 13 games listed in this post. That's less than a third of the total home games this year. If we are serious about really having a home court advantage for our team, we have to do something this year other than let the one quarter of the arena's worth of Celtics or Cavaliers fans drown us out. If booing one person gets us there, I'm all for it. Let's show every one of the guys listed in this post what it means to visit Verizon Center and take on the Wizards. Maybe the next thing someone like Kevin Durant will say about our home crowd will be something positive. It's up to us, Wizards fans.

Free Stuff! 2016-2017 Edition

Welcome to my fifth annual preview of the Washington Wizards season promotional schedule. Go check out the Wizards website right now and you won't find this information anywhere on there. This is an exclusive scoop. Sort of. Tell everyone you know who cares about this stuff that you read it here first. OK, so honestly, it's not like I have some inside connection in the Wizards organization. I know this stuff because I picked up one of those little paper fold out schedules at tonight's preseason Wizards - Philadelphia 76ers game. Nonetheless, here's the scoop. Of sorts.

It seems like the Wizards are making this post easier to write every year because they have insisted over the last few years on minimizing the amount of giveaway games. I'm serious. Check out the track record. Four seasons ago, there were six giveaway games. The next season, five. Two years ago they cut it back to four giveaway games and they managed to hold steady at that number last year too. This year? Three. That's it. Despite the number of sponsors' logos affixed to the Verizon Center walls near the main entrance getting bigger every year, the dedicated Wizards faithful get less and less free stuff each year. I guess Capital One deserves a little kudos here because they are the only one of VC's sponsors helping with a freebie this year. Not a good trend.

Given the small amount of promotional nights, you'd think I would be upset. I mean, I love stocking my shelves at home with free Wiz swag. But I'm not as upset as I could be, which you know means there must be at least one bobblehead on the schedule. Spoiler alert: there is! Let's take a look at what's available this season. It won't take long I promise. And as usual, I include my take on how important these items should be in your lives. Nowhere else, folks.

As an aside before we get to the list, if you can call it that, check out the Milwaukee Bucks' and Golden State Warriors' promotional schedule pages. Multiple bobbleheads and multiple sponsors. These guys are pretty much the gold standard for in-game giveaways. Anyway, let's get to our three.

Schedule Magnet (Essential)

November 2 vs. Toronto

Ahhh...the schedule magnet. A home opener tradition unlike any other. It's the perfect way to get the season going. Slap it on your fridge the night after the game (if we win) or the next morning or weekend or whenever (if we lose) and keep it there all season long to act as an essential planning tool. I can't imagine what I'd do without this giveaway each and every season.

Do not miss out on this, folks! Although honestly, these things tend to kick around the building for those who can't make it to the season opener. Of all the in-game giveaways, you are more likely to pick one of these up somehow after this game than any other freebie. When I get mine this year, I'll be taking last year's (shown above) off my refrigerator and sticking it in the box that holds all the other ones I own. Don't ask why I save this stuff; I just do.

Kelly Oubre, Jr. Bobblehead (Essential)

March 3 vs. Toronto

I guess when the Raptors show up at Verizon Center this regular season, we get something worthwhile handed to us at the door.

So this is it. THE bobblehead for the 2016-2017 season. DO NOT miss this game, people. My active Wizards players bobblehead collection is down to just three players in John Wall, Bradley Beal and Otto Porter so getting a fourth to start to resemble a starting lineup will be good. I can insert my Marcin Gortat action figure in there if I feel I really need to.

I honestly thought KOJ would end up as the G Wiz Kids' Club bobblehead this year since he's been the designated second player (along with Otto) to attend the kids' halloween party the last couple of years. I take his insertion into the regular season as a sign that there will be no bobblehead offered with the Kids Club membership this year, although I may just be a glass half empty guy on this one.

Now the only question is...will Kelly's bobblehead have short shorts?

Team Poster (PASS!)

March 5 vs. Orlando

So there are only three giveaway nights and two of them are two days apart? That's right. But it doesn't matter. For me, the team poster is one of those things I just don't pick up at the door. I just wave it off like I'm too adult for handouts at the door while knowing all along it's just not true. I just don't want a poster.

And just like that, we're at the end of this post. That didn't take long, did it? Feel better about the low number of giveaways now? Nope, me either.

Pick up the fold out schedule at a game in the near future and you'll find a whole list of promotional nights including Social Media Night, Polish Heritage Night, Kids Night, Kids Day, Faith and Family Night and Monumental Sports Network Night (way to self promote here). Don't be fooled. These are schemes to sell more tickets, not give more stuff away. I'm circling March 3 on my magnetic schedule when I pick it up. Unfortunately, getting the good free stuff this year is easy. Maybe next year...

Monumental Rewards Changes

With the start of the NBA season now less than three weeks away, it will soon be time for Wizards season ticket holders to start paying attention again to the team's Monumental Rewards program in a more serious way. That is, assuming we still see any substantial value in this program at all. For those of us who do or are still maintaining hope, it looks like there are some changes either implemented or in store.

Since this program was introduced by the team prior to the 2013-2014 season, I've had an up and down relationship with it. I loved it at first because it got me into the VIP lounges a whole bunch of times in the first year it was implemented; loved it less the next year when they cut that experience back to just once each month; became disillusioned with the program when they deleted that benefit entirely and replaced it with a once a year much higher priced shared suite experience; then maybe saw an uptick this summer with a Capitals exclusive edition bobblehead and some Mystics benefits I was able to take advantage of. Now the program is entering its fourth year. Let's take a look at some implemented and potential changes before we get this season kicked off. We'll look at this thing in three parts.

The Current Catalog

When I'm dealing with the items available now on the Monumental Rewards site, I'm really talking about items and experiences related to the Wizards, not the entire available inventory. Last year my opinion of the items available for purchase here was pretty low. Like literally there was nothing I wanted except a couple of tickets to a suite game, which (again) the team limited to a single purchase.

So what's available right now? Here's the current list, with points value and some snarky comments.

• Wizards Portfolio Notebook (5,000 points): Depending on the size I could actually use one of these. I've been using the same notebook at work for about 20 years now.
• Wizards Moscow Mule Mug Set (60,000 points): Don't drink Moscow mules and I own glasses that work already if I did. By the way I have no idea why this item even exists. Are Moscow mules a big thing? They must be, right? Excuse me if I'm out of touch here.
• Wizards Shooting Sleeve (5,000 points): Why? Why would I ever need this. There is a limit of two on this item due to limited availability. Again...why? Who even wants ONE of these?
• Wizards Umbrella (20,000 points): I'm of the opinion that you can never have too many umbrellas.
• Wizards Shot Glass (15,000 points): Seems a bit high priced but OK. Not really a shots at home guy, though.
• Wizards Beach Towel (15,000 points): OK. Fine.
• Wizards Travel Bag (45,000 points): This was the season ticket holder gift last year. Already have one that I haven't used.
• Wizards DC Rising T Shirt (1,000 points): Leftover in game giveaway. There are made in XL only. I am not XL.
• John Wall 2015 All Star Frame (5,000 points): Already have one. It's in the back of my closet.
• Wizards Aluminum Water Bottle (5,000 points): Already have one that I haven't used.

I'm not pumped about the current catalog in case that wasn't obvious. Now in their defense Monumental Sports has added new items this summer to about double the available items and they just added the portfolio in the last week. Maybe there's more to come. Or maybe I better just get more optimistic about what's already available. I might not have any choice on this last point. Shooting sleeve, anyone?

Earning and Using Points

The big news for me on earning and using points which broke this past month is that you can no longer hang on to your Monumental Rewards points forever. Yep, that's right. These things now expire. I currently have about 140,000 points and according the my last Monumental Rewards statement, 44,347 of them are going to disappear on December 31 of this year. This is too bad because I had some sort of grand vision of stockpiling an enormous amount of points for some future auction of concert tickets or something like that because right now I'm just not competitive on most auctions (we'll get to auctions in a minute or two). Now I'm going to be forced to buy something I don't want or just give up the points. Unless something good is posted in the next month or so, I may end up with an umbrella, a portfolio, a beach towel and a shooting sleeve (because why not?). Christmas presents maybe?

The smaller news on the earning side is that it appears the 125 point credit for posting each of our season tickets on Ticketmaster re-sale site (with an added 125 per ticket for a sale) has disappeared. This was a great deal and it's too bad it's gone because this was a great way to rack up some points in a system that only really handed out a significant amount of points for dollars spent on season tickets. Even if we didn't intend to sell our tickets, we could earn a few extra points by posting tickets; the points didn't expire with an expired listing. Now those of us who spend relatively little on season tickets have less of a way to get more points to compete with those who pay a lot. The rich get richer is the message here. On the other hand, if the catalog doesn't change and points are going to expire, I'm not sure I care about losing this way of getting more points.

Translating the Current Capitals Catalog to the Wizards

So what's in store in the future? Well, if I waited a couple of weeks to post this, I could probably tell you point by point but where's the fun in that when I actually have the opportunity to hopefully speculate by looking at items recently added to the Washington Capitals category of the catalog.

The Caps catalog right now is way better than the Wizards catalog. There's a big reason for that: the team just added a whole bunch of items to the stockroom. Within the last couple of weeks, they have added some clothing, suite tickets, an insulated lunchbox and some other things like a riding the zamboni experience. They have also added a brand new bobblehead of T.J. Oshie to go with last season's Monumental Rewards only Andre Burakovsky bobblehead (which interestingly has recently had it's price slashed in half to just 15,000 points). I'm hoping this means similar items will be added to the Wiz side of the store, although I'm wondering if the price cut on the Burakovsky bobble means there's no demand and the team will abandon my personal dream of Monumental Rewards-only Wizards bobbleheads. Please, no!!!

So about those suite tickets... As I mentioned earlier in this post, last year suite tickets were available for purchase on a once per season type offer. The suite tickets were set at a lump sum price which varied by opponent (I paid more for suite tickets against the Celtics than my buddy Stephen did for the same item vs. the Pistons for example). If the Caps catalog is any indicator, this same deal won't stand this year.

Right now there are three sets of suite tickets available on the Monumental Rewards site for October (these are shown in the picture above). They include four (rather than two last year) tickets so that's an improvement. Well, unless you don't need four tickets of course. They are also no longer fixed price but instead are offered at auction. And that's very bad for fans like me and those who spend less than me per season. Of the three auctions, I'm already priced out of two of them and would have to pretty much go all in if I wanted to bid on the third.

Why is this bad? Well, it's because of the way points are earned. Auctions favor those who spend the most on tickets. Season ticket holders earn five points for each dollar spent on season tickets. That means someone like me who spends $9,350 on season tickets get awarded 46,750 points each year. That seems like a lot but not if anything valuable on the site is selling at auction for over 100,000 points and you can't save your points from year to year. 

Now let's say you buy VIP tickets (which already gets you club access and free food and drinks every game) at the cheapest level, which is $186 per seat. Buying two season tickets gets you just shy of 80,000 points, which still doesn't win you an auction for suite tickets. Buy a pair of cheap seats on the side of the court inside the hockey boards ($320 per game by the way) and those come with 136,000 points. NOW you can start buying up items at auction. There are maybe 300 accounts in this price range and they can buy all the good stuff if they really want to, leaving the rest of us to wonder why we own two Wizards shooting sleeves.

Are you tired of me complaining? I am. I hate complaining. I hate complaining even more about a program that is an added benefit just within the last four years with no increase in cost. Well, except for the steadily rising cost of attending games to watch a team that hasn't raised any banner since 1979 that is. Maybe the bar was set too high the first year. Maybe since it's an advertised benefit, I am annoyed that the program value really has diminished to nothing. Or maybe I should just stop paying attention to Monumental Rewards because it's too upsetting.

I still maintain some sort of hope that something good will come out of this site in the future. But I'm also prepared to buy a couple of umbrellas and not get anything substantial this year. It's too bad. It was a great idea. Once.

47 Wins? (Revisited)

It's October, which means it's finally time for some hoops games that mean something. But not quite yet. Training camp ended yesterday, the first preseason game is Tuesday night at Verizon Center and we have six more of those before the season opener on October 27. We'll have to wait until November 2 to see the Wizards play a meaningful game in the District. Get excited, kids!

Four years ago, I wrote a post on this blog lamenting the Washington Wizards' distinct lack of success since I became a season ticket holder in the year 2000. Among the miserable statistics cited in that post were the second lowest average win total in the NBA; being tied for the most number of sub-20 win seasons in the league; the fourth lowest number of playoff appearances; zero titles of any sort (tied with eight other teams); and being one of only two teams (along with the then Charlotte Bobcats) not to win at least 47 games in a single season.

 

It was this last point that represented my hope at the beginning of each season. Maybe, just maybe, I've thought each October for the past several years, this might be the year the Wizards make it to 47 wins in a single campaign. They came close two years ago, posting a 36 year high win total of 46 but they failed to make it to the promised land. Note I'm not even talking about winning a division title, or an NBA Championship, I'm just hoping for a .573 winning percentage. Almost everyone else had done it in the first 12 years I paid money for a full season of Wizards tickets. Why can't we???

 

So it's four years later and I thought I'd check to see how my favorite team is doing since I got roped into this season ticket holder gig. Strap in, folks. This one is going to sting (again). I promise. And yes, if you want to infer a pun there, it's intended.

Wins Per Season

 

Over the past 16 seasons, the Washington Wizards have posted an average wins per season number of 33.6. That's up 2.2 games over the last four seasons and good for third worst in the NBA over that span. Yes, in the last four years, we managed to pass the Minnesota Timberwolves, a team that hasn't made the playoffs in a dozen years. So we now stand ahead of the T-Wolves and the Charlotte Hornets, who five seasons ago set an NBA historical worst mark for winning percentage in a season. Good company, right?

 

There's some good news over the last four years though: there have been no sub-20 win seasons in that period for Wizards fans, which means the total number of those abominations over my season ticket tenure remains at two. That's still tied with the Cleveland Cavaliers and Charlotte Bobcats/Hornets over that period but it's actually no longer the worst in the NBA. That distinction goes to the Timberwolves (again, Minnesota is saving us) and the Philadelphia 76ers, who have accomplished that dubious feat three times in the last three seasons. Feeling good about that? Don't. Just don't. And not just because the hated Cavs just won it all.

 

So then there's that 47 wins thing. I have bad news for Wizards fans. We are no longer one of two teams to fail to win 47 games in a single season since I became a season ticket holder because last year the Hornets took themselves out of that club by winning not just 47 but 48 games. So now every team in the NBA has won 48 games in the 21st century except one: my beloved Washington Wizards. Told you this would sting. Let's keep going shall we?

Playoff Wins Per Season

Over the past 16 years, the Washington Wizards have made six playoff appearances. That total is good for sixth worst in the NBA over that span (woo hoo! up two spots), although it might as well be fifth worst because we are actually ahead of the Golden State Warriors who of course won a title two seasons ago (d'oh!). We're tied with the Clippers here and ahead of (in addition to the Dubs) Sacramento, New York, Minnesota and Charlotte. Quick: name a well run franchise among those four. Sadly, I think you might have to say Charlotte. Playoff appearances not good for the Wiz.

 

However, when we make the playoffs, we have been winning, thanks in part to Randy Wittman's possum tactics relative to the regular season. Yep, in the two appearances the team has made in the last four years, they have won six games in each try and have a winning record in each of those appearances, although both flamed out in the second round. When considering average wins per playoff appearance over the last 16 years, the Wizards are actually tied for ninth worst in the league, which might make you feel good. Isn't it amazing that being tied for 21st place is a source of pride for me? The bar is so low for this team for me.

Division Titles, Conference Titles and NBA Championships

So this is the category where you actually win something. And by that I mean the team doesn't sell shirts if they win 50, 55 or 60 games (although honestly I might custom commission a 47 wins Wizards shirt if we ever get there) but they do sell Division, Conference or League champions merch.

Four years after my initial assessment of the Wizards having won nothing, they have still won nothing. Despite that apparent lack of movement, we have actually moved backwards in this category because some of the other teams that hadn't won anything four years ago actually have now. So the list of teams that has not won anything in the last 16 NBA seasons stands at just three: the Charlotte Hornets, the Memphis Grizzlies and (drumroll please...) the Washington Wizards. In the last four years, the other teams who lacked a division title four years ago, namely the Atlanta Hawks, Golden State Warriors, Houston Rockets, New York Knicks and Portland Trail Blazers, have all won one. I'm officially depressed now.

 

This was not a fun post to write on a Sunday morning that is supposed to be relaxing. I am now entering my seventeenth year as Wizards season ticket holder. Over that period of time I've been treated to the third worst winning percentage in the league, the sixth fewest playoff appearances in the NBA, zero titles and no 47 win seasons, which is dead last in the NBA over that span. Oh, and some ticket price hikes the last few years, but that's another story.

 

So what do I hope for this season? Well ever the optimist I continue to hope for those elusive 47 wins (although I should really raise the bar to 48) and I can't believe we don't have a shot at the Southeast Division this year (since the Miami Heat won it last year with 48 Ws). Don't tell me I'm fooling myself; I'll find out soon enough. Let's go Wizards!

John Wall In Wizards History

It's getting towards mid-September. That means it will soon be time for training camp and then some meaningful NBA action in the District. It's been a busy August and it will likely be an even busier September for me so this is likely the only post I'll put out there this month although I'll sneak another one in if I can. If not, I promise to get after it in October again.

Every so often I sit back and think about how great John Wall is. I'm serious. Going into his seventh NBA season (all with the Wizards of course), I'm thinking this guy could be one of the greatest players, if not THE greatest player who has ever played for the Washington Wizards franchise in whatever city and under whatever nickname the team happened to play. Of course, I'm talking statistically here. It's going to be difficult to be the Wizards/Bullets/Zephyrs/Packers G.O.A.T. without a ring won with the home team.

So what do I mean "statistically"? Well literally just that. Have you checked out where John sits after just six seasons, one of which was lockout shortened to just 66 games, on the all time leaderboard for the Wiz? Take a look. On second thought, don't. Just keep reading. Assuming a typical NBA season for John, he'll be our franchise leader in two of the key positive individual statistics. And yes, I say "positive" because at the age of 26 he is already the franchise leader in turnovers (primary ball handlers always are). This (and the two other number one spots he'll occupy in team history by about February 2017 assuming full or moderately full health) is both a testament to how good John is and how bad my favorite hoops team has been since it entered the league in 1961.

I'm only digging so deep here. I'll limit my analysis to the five positive stats that make up a typical (or not so typical) triple double (that is points, rebounds, assists, blocks and steals) plus games played and minutes played. I think you'll be surprised if you haven't kept track of this stuff closely. All statistics are regular season only by the way.

Games Played

Franchise Leader: Wes Unseld (984)

In six seasons with the franchise, John has played in 422 games for the Wizards. That's a long way from Wes Unseld's 984. He'll need more than six more seasons of good health to get even close to the number one spot. Having said that, he stands a very good chance of cracking the top ten in the first half of the 2017-2018 season. If he plays all 82 games this season (and I sincerely hope he does not by his or Scott Brooks' choice) he will have 504 games played all time for the Wiz. Kevin Grevey is 10th in franchise history with 530. Wes is still a long way away.

Minutes Played

Franchise Leader: Wes Unseld (35,832)

John has currently logged a total of 15,195 minutes played in a Wizards blue, gold and black or red, white and blue jersey. That's already good enough after almost six seasons for 10th on the all time franchise games played list. If he manages 2,500 minutes this year (a little more than 33 minutes over 75 games which is way less than he's played recently), he'll pass Antawn Jamison for 9th. Up next after that? Juwan Howard at 17,845. If John plays out his contract in good health with a reasonable number of minutes, he'll be number three behind Wes and Elvin Hayes.

Points

Franchise Leader: Elvin Hayes (15,551)

With 7,614 points in his first six campaigns, John is about halfway to the Big E's franchise leading total. He's got a long way to go but it's not unreasonable assuming he re-ups with the Wiz after his current contract expires that he could end up on top of this list. If he manages 1,500 points this year (less than last year's number) he pass Walt Bellamy for seventh on the all time list with Phil Chenier next in his sights. At the end of his current contract he could realistically be challenging Wes Unseld for third place all time.

Rebounds

Franchise Leader: Wes Unseld (13,769)

No way is John ever catching Wes in rebounds. His career high in rebounds was 379 which he achieved last year. If he does that for three more seasons, he'll be nipping at Rick Mahorn's heels in tenth place. While it seems crazy to even have a discussion about John being a franchise leader in rebounding, it should be noted he's already 10th in franchise history in defensive rebounding.

Assists

Franchise Leader: Wes Unseld (3,822)

Yes, the Wizards franchise leader in assists is a center. Somehow that makes so much sense for this team. But he won't be for long. As of the beginning of this upcoming season, John is second with 3,779, just 43 behind Wes. So in the fourth, fifth or sixth game John plays this year, he should be the franchise leader. He's likely to stay in that spot for a while considering John's got two more years after this one on his contract and he's been first, second and third in total assists in the NBA over the past three seasons. This is the mark he needs to hold for our franchise and he will pretty soon.

Blocks

Franchise Leader: Elvin Hayes (1,558)

Just like he's not catching Wes Unseld's rebounds mark, John's also not going to beat out Elvin here. After last year's 59 blocks, John has a total all time of 273. Wes Unseld is sitting at tenth place with 367. He'll catch Wes, but not likely this year. Blocks were only counted as a statistic starting in the 1973-1974 season so we are missing a dozen or so years of franchise history on this statistic.

Steals

Franchise Leader: Greg Ballard (762)

For a brief moment during the 2016-2017 NBA season, the Washington Wizards will have four different franchise leaders in the categories of points, rebounds, assists, blocks and steals. A few months later, they won't because John's going to catch Greg Ballard this year if he plays at least half the season. For the last three years, John has tallied 138 or more steals per season. At 713 in his career right now, he needs just 49 to pass Ballard. Sorry, Greg. Like blocks, steals were not tracked until the '73-'74 season.

I've had the privilege the last six seasons to watch John play night in and night out at Verizon Center from the fourth or fifth row of Section 109. There are about five or six passes John Wall makes per season that absolutely astonish me down at the east end of the building. I think it's appropriate he'll be our franchise leader in that category this year. I'll continue to wear my number 2 home white jersey with pride this season and hopefully for many more to come.

NBA Logo Rank 2016 Update

Three years ago in this blog, I ranked every NBA mascot from 30 to number one. Two years ago, I did the same thing with team names. Last year, I offered my thoughts on each of the logo packages (one just isn't enough any more it seems) rolled out by the franchises that make up the Association.

Team names are pretty much a constant so I don't think I'll be needing to update that countdown any time soon. But mascots and logos are an entirely different story. I've had to update my mascot rank each of the last three years because the NBA owners can't leave well enough (or bad enough) alone when it comes to sticking some dude in a costume. I rolled out my revised mascot rank last month. This month I'm tinkering with my logo rankings because well, folks keep tinkering with these things. Here's what the same and what's new and how I believe this all stacks up this year starting with the bottom of the bottom.

30. Los Angeles Clippers

One year into their 2015 re-brand, the Clippers logo package looks as terrible as it did when it was first rolled out. I struggle to believe Steve Ballmer sleeps well at night knowing he paid some good money to have a group of marketing folks come up with the awful wordmarks and graphics that the Clippers sport. Going to be difficult to convince me the Clips are ever going to climb out of last on this one.

29. Oklahoma City Thunder

On the other hand...the Thunder aren't much better than the Clippers. I still don't get the design of the Thunder's logo. I love the nod to native American imagery that the bulging triangle represents but it's just not doing it for me. I'd prefer a cartoon grey cloud to what they have now.

28. Denver Nuggets

For me, the Nuggets have one of the golden oldies of the old ABA in their miner with a pickax in one hand and a red, white and blue ABA ball in the other. Recently, the Philadelphia 76ers, Washington Wizards, Atlanta Hawks and Golden State Warriors have re-worked their old beloved logos to spectacular effect. Please, Denver, do the same here. The bulging Nuggets wordmark topped with the mountain ain't doing it for me.

27. Detroit Pistons

Detroit, just like Denver, had one of the best NBA logos of all time. All they had to do was, well, nothing. Just leave it alone. But instead, they had to go get some hack logo designer to draw them a new horse with tailpipes logo in some amazingly bad shade of dark teal. About a decade later they realized the error of their ways and went back close to the original logo (the NBA doesn't allow exact resurrection of old logos since for marketing rights they are all owned by a separate division of the NBA...or something like that) but the small differences make all the difference. Top 10 logo for sure mutated into a bottom five logo. Smh...

26. Dallas Mavericks

I could easily put the Mavericks further down towards the bottom of this countdown. I think they are saved by the fact that they have never had a super exciting logo that they've tried to resurrect and screwed up like the Pistons. The Mavs are pretty much the definition of boring in the graphic design department. Although I have to confess, I have no idea what's going on with the sideways leering "M" logo that looks like something out of a Spy Vs. Spy comic. Time to re-brand. Just don't do what the Clips did.

25. Cleveland Cavaliers

Boring in Dallas is preceded by boring in Cleveland. I hate the font the Cavs have elected to use here, almost as much as I hate the team itself. The Cavaliers have never had a good logo in their entire history and I think now that they have won a title (God, I hate writing that!) I think we are stuck with this sort of mediocrity for a while.

24. Orlando Magic

Ummm...it's a basketball with some stars. Doesn't seem that magical to me. However, it's better than six other logos in my opinion. Might be higher if it weren't for that terrible font the Magic insist on using.

23. Phoenix Suns

In 1968, the Phoenix Suns joined the NBA and rolled out the logo above. WHY WOULD YOU EVER CHANGE THIS LOGO??? It's simple, it's clear, it's a sun (the Suns aren't always that clear on equating their name with symbology - check out their mascot) and it's of its time. It looks like it's straight out of the late 1960s. I love it. I'd take this logo over any logo in the NBA today. Keep this intact and the Suns would be number one. As it is, they go with a flaming ball with their airport code. Pass!

22. Houston Rockets

Houston, we have liftoff. Unfortunately, the current Rockets logo doesn't do it for me. It's not the worst logo the Rockets have ever had by a long shot but it's not good all the same.

21. Minnesota Timberwolves

Rounding out my bottom 10 are the Minnesota Timberwolves, a team with a logo so complicated and intricate that there's no way a kid sitting in study hall could quickly and easily draw this thing (I spent a lot of time as a kid drawing sports logos in study hall - it's like a litmus test).  Word is that Wolves owner Glen Taylor is exploring a rebrand. They have to move up, right? I mean they just have to. Dear Mr. Taylor: don't hire the folks the Clippers hired.

20. Brooklyn Nets

The Nets are the anti-Timberwolves. They have definitely erred on the not complicated side of the equation. For sure. And this definitely passes the kid in study hall test. The problem? The kid can't spend ENOUGH time drawing this thing. Love the black and white. Don't love how simple it is.

19. Atlanta Hawks

The Hawks, like the Pistons, decided to resurrect and update one of the NBA's classic logos, the so-called Pac-Man Hawks logo. They had to change it a bit but it looks pretty much as good as it did when the team abandoned it 21 years ago. Way better than the Pistons. Bravo! But then the Hawks went off the rails with a secondary logo that looks like a winged teardrop missing the top part of the drop. I don't understand this thing at all. Big drop because of the secondary logo, Atlanta. If I were a Hawks fan no way I'd wear anything with this weird thing on it.

18. Los Angeles Lakers

The Lakers logo is classic, simple, understated and boring all at the same time. However, they have won 16 NBA titles so that's good enough to get them almost in the top half of this ranking.

17. Sacramento Kings

The big news of the offseason this year in the NBA logo department is that the Sacramento Kings finally, mercifully abandoned the tired and clunky crossed lances logo they've been using for the past 22 years. Last year, I had the Kings ranked 26th among NBA teams logo-wise. This year, they move up nine spots.

The Kings, much like the Golden State Warriors, Washington Wizards and Philadelphia 76ers have done recently are drawing on their past in determining their future. In other words, they are going back to what worked, which in the Kings' case, is totally smart. When the Kings moved to California, their logo consisted of a basketball topped by a crown which sort of doubled as a mountain range (see above left). I love the mountains and how they relate to the mountains around Sacramento, even though the team first used this motif when the franchise moved to Kansas City. I've been to KC and there are no mountains around there so I don't quite get that but it totally works in Sacto.

The new primary logo (above right) is pretty much a copy of the old one but in purple and gray. These are just horrible colors for this logo but maybe it will grow on me. While it's a huge step in the right direction for the Kings, I greatly prefer the proportion of the old logo to the new one and the font in the new logo quite honestly is not very good; waaaaaay too boxy. The old logo's not perfect; it's just better than the new one.

Of course since it's 2016 and the more logos you have, the more merch you can sell, the Kings have produced not one, not two, but three alternate logos which are shown below. Very briefly (left to right): I don't like it (too heraldic - I get that's the point - and that lion looks worse than the clumsiest big man ever dribbling a basketball; I hate it (just lose the crown logo - it's just way too simple); and I kind of like it (I like how the seams of the basketball integrated into the lion's mane).

Much improved, Sacramento, but I think at least half the NBA is still ahead of you. 

16. Indiana Pacers

Top of the bottom half and the Pacers are about the cusp of the logo sets that I actually really like. But they are not quite there. I like some aspects of the Pacers logos, but the font is off-putting for sure.

15. Toronto Raptors

The Raptors deserve a ton of credit for turning things around in the logo department the last couple of years. and for that, I'm moving them up two spots over last year's ranking. For the first 20 years of their existence they were convinced the way to get people excited about their team was to roll out a logo that looked slightly (and I really mean slightly) more scary than Barney. Their new raptor claw marks on a basketball logo is way better. Their name still sucks though and they should still change it. Huskies, please.

14. Milwaukee Bucks

I love pretty much everything about the Bucks' re-brand of last year from the colors right down to the logo package. I love how Wisconsin-centric it is to include more than just the city of Milwaukee. Can't help thinking of a deer's head on a wall when I see their primary logo though. It's going to take a long time to get over this one. Maybe like forever.

13. New Orleans Pelicans

The Pelicans have a primary logo, a partial primary logo, three secondary logos and an alternate logo that comes in four different color schemes. No other team has even close to this many truly different logos. I would say I dislike their primary logo (and partial primary), one of their secondary logos and all of their alternate logos. But I so intensely love the Crescent City Hoops and the Pelican-de-Lis logos that they make up for all the failings of all the other members of their logo family. If I were a Pels fan, I'd load up on apparel with the logos I like and aggressively boycott the others.

12. Philadelphia 76ers

I love the current 76ers primary logo. Unfortunately for the Sixers, it's not quite as good as the one they replaced which is pretty much the exact same thing but just a bit better. Also, the Ben Franklin dribbling a basketball is not a good image. Lost points for that one, Philly.

11. Utah Jazz

So let's start this with my standard disclaimer or complaint or whatever you want to call it when I discuss the Utah Jazz: worst nickname for a team given the location ever. I cannot think of a bigger disconnect between a state and a thing than Utah and Jazz. But these logos...damn they are works of art. The Jazz have made them even better this year. Not a complete re-design; the Jazz refer to it as "refreshed brand identity."

First, let's go back to last year. My biggest complaint about the Jazz logo when I first ranked all the NBA teams'  logos was the one on the left above. Like everything about it. Well, now it's gone. No more Jazz wordmark like it's going down a ski slope with some mountains on top of a basketball in the background. See ya! Good riddance!

The rest of these logos? I mean what can I say. I'd be quibbling with any negative feedback. Sure I'm not crazy about the font but I love the colors, I love the musical note and I love the reductive form of the note as a simple basketball. I love all of this. 

Except I can't get beyond Utah and Jazz. For that, these works of art finish 11th. Up five spots from last year but I'm still stuck on the name thing.

10. Portland Trail Blazers

What on Earth is the Trail Blazers' logo? It's unlike any other logo in professional sports in that it's an abstract artistic statement about the game the team plays and has nothing to do with the city or the nickname of the team itself. For that reason alone, it's timeless and never needs changing in the slightest (although the Blazers have tweaked it from the original). Rather than being confused and angry about it's lack of laterality, embrace the statement that it represents.

9. Charlotte Hornets

Depending on how you view the Hornets logo package, you might be able to argue that they have as many as the Pelicans do. But I disagree. I think the Hornets have four different logos and I think most of them are pretty good to pretty great. I don't like the C-H logo with the strange crown on top of it. Ditch that thing and the Hornets might be top five for me.

8. Miami Heat

I have a strong dislike for four Eastern Conference franchises and three of them are in the top eight in my logo rank (see 25 above for the other). Miami is the first of these three. Simple, clean, no fuss, no clouding the picture with a series of other logos. The Heat logo does the job. So why aren't they higher? Well, just like the Pelicans and Hornets, the Heat had to go tinker and introduce a second logo which is about as unimaginative as they come.

7. Golden State Warriors

I don't love the Dubs' rebrand of 2010 as much as a lot of people out there but I think it's still pretty good all the same. It bothers me tremendously that the cables on the bridge in their logo (which I assume is the Golden Gate Bridge) run diagonally not vertically as on the real thing. I like the "SF" secondary logo which they'll need if they ever finish designing and building a new arena on the San Francisco waterfront.

6. San Antonio Spurs

Silver. Black. Spur. This is the image of the Spurs that I love. It's simple, to the point and I don't even mind their reductive partial logo that they introduced in 2002. Most people I talk to about NBA uniforms and logos generally view the Spurs uni and logo design unfavorably. I think it's awesome. It's non-fancy and it wins. Just like the Spurs the last couple of decades.

5. New York Knicks

New York City Subway token logo? A+!! Basketball logo? A+!! Knicks primary logo with the triangle behind it? D-!! The Knicks are sort of the like the Pelicans here for me: two incredible logos and the rest are just bleh! Fortunately for the Knicks in this ranking, they only have one logo I dislike as opposed to the Pelicans' four to seven objectionable logos.

4. Memphis Grizzlies

The grizzly bear head is the best logo in the NBA today. So why not number one? Well, because they have other logos which are diluting the product. Not the one with the text underneath it. Just the head. Don't change the head, Memphis.

3. Washington Wizards

Go ahead, tell me this is yet ANOTHER homer pick (see my year after year mascot rank that has the Wizards at number one). I won't quite believe it 100%. I think the Wizards 2011 repackaging was well done, ditching the horrible Wizard jumping over the moon logo while also harkening back to the past of the Bullets without actually having to change the name. Maybe it's just so good to me when compared to the Wiz blue, black and bronze color scheme days. Regardless, they are number three for me.

2. Boston Celtics

The Celtics are one of those franchises that I truly dislike and yes, it's all because they beat the Wizards (and historically about everyone I guess) more often than not in front of a pro-Celtics crowd at Verizon Center. So I truly hate that I think their logo is better than the Wizards logo. But it is. Some of my best memories at Verizon Center came sitting in Section 402 when the Cs had Paul Pierce, Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen and watching the Wizards beat Boston while seemingly surrounded by Boston fans.  Those memories take the sting out of me ranking the Celtics at number two here.

1. Chicago Bulls

50 years. One logo. Got it right the first time. Winner!!! I'd have a difficult time believing the Bulls will ever be anything but number one in this ranking. The only thing that can possibly screw this up is if they decide to start introducing alternate or secondary logos that dilute their brand. Don't do it, Chicago.

About 12 months until I do this again. I guarantee someone will change something in the next year.

Team USA

The more I think and blog about my beloved Washington Wizards, the more dubious distinctions I find in the franchise's history. I don't necessarily do this deliberately and it's certainly not some sort of self-flagellation type of punishment (although I would not blame you if you interpreted things that way). It just sort of happens, kind of like the way the Stay Puft marshmallow man popped into Dr. Ray Stanz' head in Ghostbusters. It's not my fault; it just happens.

Last night the United States men's basketball team defeated Argentina in this year's Olympic Games to move into the tournament's semi-finals. That got me thinking: how has the United States' basketball team been represented across the NBA and how come there never seem to be any Washington Wizards on the USA roster every four years in the Olympics? I mean as far as I can remember I don't remember any Wizards (or Bullets) suiting up for America. I probably should have let that thought die there.

Up to and including the 1988 Olympic Games in Seoul, South Korea, NBA basketball players were prohibited from participating in Olympic completion under the pretense that it would give the United States an even bigger advantage in a sport they already dominated internationally every four years. But the 1992 Games in Barcelona would change all that and the USA responded by putting forward the Dream Team, the greatest collection of basketball players every assembled on a single team, to mop the floor with the rest of the world. And they did. And since then, Team USA has been represented solely by NBA players.

So who are all these players? Well, they are typically All-Star players on good NBA teams. Of the 83 slots filled by NBA players in the last eight Olympics, six of those spots have been filled by players from the Miami Heat (Hardaway, Mourning, Wade twice, Odom and James), New York Knicks (Ewing, Houston, Marbury(!), Chandler and Anthony twice) and Utah Jazz (Malone twice, Stockton twice, Boozer and Williams). The remaining 71? Various players from 25 of the other 27 franchises in the NBA. Yes, there have been two franchises that have never been represented on Team USA. The Atlanta Hawks and, of course, you knew this was coming, the Washington Wizards.

I know what you are thinking. That can't be, right? I mean there are some really bad teams out there or teams that just don't have the superstar caliber players to make it to a US Olympic roster, right? How about the Nets? Well, the Nets sent Richard Jefferson in 2004 when they were in Jersey and Deron Williams eight years later from Brooklyn. How about the Grizzlies? Well, almost not. Shareef Abdur-Rahim represented the US in Sydney in 2000 when he played for the VANCOUVER Grizzlies. But surely not the Bobcats / Hornets. Well actually, yes, again. Emeka Okafor in 2004.

So despite all those players representing our country, no Wizard has ever made it? How about Michael Jordan, Mitch Richmond and Christian Laettner? Sure, all three of those guys made it to the Games and they all played for the Wizards. But Jordan was the 1992 version of his airness, not the MJ that played in the District from 2001-2003. Mitch Richmond was close, just a couple of years from being broken down entirely and shipped to Washington for an almost in his prime Chris Webber, who appeared in four All-Star games for the Kings after being run out of town by the Bullets. And Laettner was just a college kid on the Dream Team, the reason that 83 of the 84 roster spots were filled by NBA players; Laettner got number 84. And we've already talked about Emeka Okafor.

Now, there have been some good players that have been on either a Bullets or Wizards roster since the Dream Team was formed. Webber and teammate Juwan Howard each made an appearance in an All-Star game but never sniffed Olympic competition. Antawn Jamison and Caron Butler each made two All-Star teams in the mid aughts but were offered as much as Webber and Howard. True, Gilbert Arenas and John Wall (the team's only three time All-Stars in recent memory) and Bradley Beal got some consideration (Beal actually got an invite to be on the team this year) but ultimately didn't participate. Nothing.

In my three plus years writing this blog, I've written about the Wizards winning nothing since I started buying season tickets: no division titles, no conference titles and no NBA titles. Now you can add no USA Olympians to that list. Thank God for Atlanta here. I really thought the Wiz would end up as the lone team without a Team USA representative. When's the season start again? I gotta have something to take my mind off of this stuff.